The Hidden Meaning in Your Pain: Mythologizing Your Life

My panic attacks taught me how to write better

by Nico Delrot

Reflecting on my panic attacks in a recent journaling session reminded me of an important truth:

“Invisible fate may show up as visible failures.” -James Hillman (The Soul’s Code)

People usually try to “read” and understand their lives as they happen, moment by moment, or even in advance.

Then, when faced with failure or suffering, they think there’s no meaning in them - because they can’t make sense of them in the present.

But the mythological view of life requires you to look at your life backward to make sense of it.

Reading my life backward, I had to fall into despair and question my sanity in order to finally re-examine my relationship with life in a brutally honest way.

I had to experience both crippling panic attacks and not wanting to get out of bed to face life in order to write for you in a human, relatable way.

However, it’s not as if I was relieved of the pain by understanding its meaning while going through it.

Years later, and I’m still collecting insights from that period of my life. In 2024, I had multiple breakthroughs in understanding how certain internal and external struggles I experienced in 2021 fit perfectly into the story of my life. I’m still collecting insights. And it’s an active process.

Friends, your struggle is not meaningless. You need context. And proper context isn’t accumulated simply through passage of time.

You need constructive self-reflection and meaningful life engagement.

You need just enough insight from the past to engage in building your present. As you move forward, new life experiences translate to proper context for your past to take on a new, healthier meaning.

Your past doesn’t need to be a burden-it can be the building block of your adventure.

Open your eyes, your destiny is hidden in plain sight.

Here is a challenge for you:

Constructive self-reflection: Identify one difficult and painful period or event in your past that revealed or amplified a personality trait that you love about yourself.

Life-engagement: Engage in ANY kind of forward-facing project, a construction of something new in your life. This new “thing” you are building can be a habit, a friendship, or knowledge on a certain topic.

I’ll be asking soon to see how you’re doing.

P.S. I added a bonus lesson to Clarity Quest, my 7-day guided self-exploration.

In 7 video lessons and 7 guided introspection and journaling exercises, I will help you:

• Outline your life story and start rewriting it.

• Tap into your richest sources of motivation.

• Discover the calling of your higher nature and find your purpose.

• Organize your self-education to go from mental masturbation to actual progress.

• Take control your life path into your own hands.

• Build resilience for future challenges.

Bonus lesson: Fear of Growth from the perspective of Jung and Maslow.

Join 3,350+ explorers and start your Clarity Quest.

(If you’re a member of Sisyphus Society, you have access to all of this - no need to join.)