Dopamine Nation, Fatalistic Resignation, Connection over Perfection

Existential Espresso Vol. 65

What I’ve been reading:

“Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence” by Anna Lembke

You must take the quality of your life into your own hands.

The institutions, and even the dominant values of our society, don’t play a supportive role in you living a meaningful life as they once did.

You must learn to set your own goals, manage your own life path, and create your own rewards, incentives, and limitations.

If you don’t do it for yourself, the way these things will be provided to you won’t lead to a meaningful and fulfilling life.

This isn’t a quote from the book, nor is it a summary of what the book is about. This is a note I recently made to myself while outlining some of the major questions and issues I want to tackle through my work in the future.

And in this note is the reason why I decided to read Dopamine Nation. The “your own rewards, incentives, and limitations” part has never been harder to deal with than today. Annna Lembke was spot on when, in the subtitle of the book, she called our age “the Age of Indulgence.” Finding balance in our consumption, stimulation, and pleasure-seeking is one of the most pressing problems we are facing today.

If we want to learn how to create healthy rewards, incentives, and limitations for ourselves in the age of abundance, we must learn more about the neurotransmitter that plays a key role in pleasure and motivation: dopamine.

As I’m finishing my first reading of it, I expected it to focus more on the science of dopamine and less on the author’s anecdotes. Not that I didn’t find value in the anecdotes, but for a more in-depth study of dopamine, I will look for another book. With that being said, I would still recommend Dopamine Nation as an interesting read.

What I’ve been listening to:

Elon Musk DealBook interview

If you are someone who likes to keep up with what’s happening on “the world stage,” you’ve probably heard about the now-infamous DealBook interview where Musk told advertisers who are leaving X (twitter) to “go f yourself.”

I am not a fanboy of Elon Musk. I strongly disagree with some of his philosophical and political views. And I think that people who view him as the savior of humanity are intellectually lazy at the very least.

However, I do have great respect for him as someone who has proven time and time again that he is not afraid to go all in on his vision, someone who is clearly more attracted to great challenges than to living a hedonistic billionaire lifestyle. Besides this, he has gained my respect as someone who is not afraid to show the middle finger to the establishment, even literally.

But you know what’s the most interesting thing about this interview? Mainstream media, having zero integrity and concern for the truly important topics, has put all the focus on the big “go f yourself” moment as the point of Musk’s meltdown. All the while, there is almost no talk about the portion of the interview where AI is discussed. More specifically, the moment where Musk says that, after not being able to sleep for a long time from worrying about the dangers of AI, now “fatalistic resignation” helps him sleep at night. One of the most powerful men in the world has accepted the fact that humanity is doomed. I would say that’s a topic worth our attention. But what do I know?

Click here to watch.

What I’ve been thinking about:

Can you, at least for a moment, entertain the idea that connection, and not perfection, is the goal of your life story?

Connection, as in, accepting and embracing all of your past, no matter how unpleasant, because it’s all part of the same story. All the regrets and mistakes, all the heartbreaks, all the losses and failures.

And not perfection, that is, wishing to somehow erase all those uncofmortable parts of your story in order to make it “perfect.”

If you accepted this idea of connection over perfection, how would this change the way you look at yourself and your life? How would it change the way you treat yourself? How would it change the way you engage with the world?

Just something to think about.

Thank you for reading.

Stay strong, love life, and never feel sorry for yourself.

Free Resources:

My Book Recommendation List

My free ebook: The Lost Art of Reading

My free training programs

Paid Resources:

The Art of Showing Up: A Clear and Practical Method for Mastering Consistency

The Gold Pill: Timeless Ideas for a Life Worth Living

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