Let's face it, we are living in a time that is slowly (or quickly?) killing our ability to experience true fulfillment.
The current cultural climate, characterized by a fast-paced digital age and an unprecedented level of interconnectivity, has given rise to an unhealthy obsession with outcomes and rewards. This amplified focus on what lies at the end of our efforts, the fruits of our labors, is undermining our ability to find joy in the process itself.
Don't get me wrong, rewards are not inherently bad. We're wired to seek them. Imagine a world where no one cared about outcomes or rewards. Would anything get accomplished? Probably not.
However, our modern society, with the advent of social media, has dialed up this reward-centric mindset to an unhealthy extreme. Social media platforms can be phenomenal tools for positive impact; otherwise, why would I be creating content for them? Yet they've also contributed to a pervasive sense of dissatisfaction because we constantly witness someone else who seems to be achieving more.
We’ve become a generation fixated on always needing to "level up" in comparison to others. And if you feel such pressure to "level up," then you have to view every activity through the lens of what reward or outcome it can bring you.
So here we are, engrossed in a cycle of "doing for the sake of achieving." We're often focused on how an activity can benefit us, how it might enhance our image, or how it contributes to our personal growth. But amidst this frenzy, have we forgotten the pure joy of engaging in an activity simply for the love of it? Remember how, as children, we’d lose ourselves in play without any thought of rewards or achievements? Those were moments of genuine and sustainable fulfillment.
Now, I propose we rekindle this forgotten joy. Let's shift our mindset and start investing our energies into activities we love, not solely for what they might yield in the future but for the sheer pleasure they bring in the present.
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, the pioneering psychologist best known for his concept of ‘flow’, said it best:
"The mystique of rock climbing is climbing; you get to the top of a rock glad it’s over but really wish it would go on forever."
He explains how the process of climbing itself, the act of overcoming personal barriers, and the feeling of flow is the reward. This principle applies to everything we do, from writing to martial arts, from meditation to gardening.
Now, the key here isn't to become a master in these activities and win gold medals. Instead, it's about relishing the activity for its own sake and gaining control over our attention. This way, our actions aren’t driven by external rewards but by the intrinsic value and fulfillment they provide. And, ironically or not, you are more likely to come closer to a master-level by adopting this mindset since you’ll be in it for the long run.
This mindset is also what Abraham Maslow's concept of "peak experiences" advocates for. These moments of ecstatic joy and fulfillment aren't confined to milestones or achievements; they're often found in everyday instances of deep engagement and focus. For example, getting lost in a captivating book, delving into a creative project, or working out with all your energy.
Maslow suggested that peak experiences are characterized by a total absorption in the present moment, a forgetfulness of past and future, and a kind of innocence that allows us to interact with the world without prejudice.
We surrender our past baggage, we relinquish our future anxieties, and we devote ourselves entirely to the present.
This complete involvement allows us to lose our ego, forget our self-imposed limitations, and immerse ourselves in the flow of the activity. It is in this state that we often discover our true identity and tap into our deepest nature.
Engaging in an activity for its own sake also cultivates strength and courage. It helps us break free from societal pressures and norms and encourages us to face the unfamiliar, the ambiguous, and the contradictory.
So, my fellow explorers, even though I know it’s a difficult task, I ask you to resist the temptation and stop thinking about the reward in everything that you do.
Because what kind of friend would I be if I thought you should avoid something because it’s difficult?
Let’s embrace the spirit of playfulness once again. In a world that only talks about profit and gain, it seems to me that people forget how much they are losing by not learning how to enjoy activities for their own sake. They are losing themselves.
Thank you for reading.
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Csikszentmihalyi and Maslow, who are mentioned in this essay, and their practical and actionable ideas on structuring a more enjoyable and meaningful life are important parts of this course.
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The beauty of this reading was a hug for our soul. Make sure you make your inner child proud.
Seek for gratitude and amusement in the progress of achievement... not in the rewards, as they are the minor of the values.